I Am Not a Morning Person - The Manifesto
They say the early bird gets the worm. Cool. Let it have the worm.
This brutally honest, dryly hilarious mini-guide is for anyone who's ever been personally victimized by an alarm clock. I Am Not a Morning Person – The Manifesto is your official permission slip to hate mornings unapologetically, with style, sarcasm, and an unwashed coffee mug.
From the painful moment you open one eye to the soul-depleting chirp of an early riser trying to make conversation, this is the rally cry for the sleep-deprived and mentally buffering.
☕ Inside You’ll Find:
- Morning avoidance strategies disguised as self-care
- Survival rituals that start with caffeine and end in emotional neutrality
- A deconstruction of the “rise and grind” cult
- Zero inspiration. Zero guilt. Maximum relatability.
Mornings are a scam. This is your unapologetic guide to resisting the tyranny of early alarms, forced cheerfulness, and people who open blinds like they’re doing you a favor. Because thriving before 10AM is not the goal — survival is.